Controlling your temper isn’t always easy. But these effective anger management tips will help give you the upper hand. Do you find yourself fuming when someone cuts you off in traffic? Does your blood pressure go through the roof when your child won’t cooperate? Anger is a normal and even healthy emotion, but learning how to deal with it in a positive way is important. Uncontrolled anger can make both you and other people feel lousy.

If your outbursts, rages or frustrations are negatively affecting relationships with family, friends, co-workers or even complete strangers, it’s time to learn some anger management skills.

Anger management techniques are a proven way to help change the way you express your anger.

10 tips to help get your anger under control

· Take a ‘timeout.’ Although it may seem cliche, counting to 10 before reacting really can defuse your temper.

· Get some space. Take a break from the person you’re angry with until your frustrations subside a bit.

· Once you’re calm, express your anger. It’s healthy to express your frustration in a nonconfrontational way. Stewing about it can make the situation worse.

· Get some exercise. Physical activity can provide an outlet for your emotions, especially if you’re about to erupt. Go for a brisk walk or a run, swim, lift weights or shoot baskets.

· Think carefully before you say anything. Otherwise, you’re likely to say something you’ll regret. It can be helpful to write down what you want to say so that you can stick to the issues. When you’re angry, it’s easy to get sidetracked.

· Identify solutions to the situation. Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work with the person who angered you to resolve the issue at hand.

· Use ‘I’ statements when describing the problem. This will help you to avoid criticizing or placing blame, which can make the other person angry or resentful — and increase tension. For instance, say, “I’m upset you didn’t help with the housework this evening,” instead of, “You should have helped with the housework.”

· Don’t hold a grudge. If you can forgive the other person, it will help you both. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want.

· Use humor to release tensions. Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Don’t use sarcasm, though — it’s can hurt feelings and make things worse.

· Practice relaxation skills. Learning skills to relax and de-stress can also help control your temper when it may flare up. Practice deep-breathing exercises, visualize a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase to yourself, such as “Take it easy.” Other proven ways to ease anger include listening to music, writing in a journal and doing yoga.

I heard of a bus driver in Chicago who sings, while he drives. That’s right… sings! And I don’t mean he sings softly to himself, either. He sings so that the whole bus can hear! All day long he drives and sings.

He was once interviewed on Chicago television. He said that he is not actually a bus driver. “I’m a professional singer,” he asserted. “I only drive the bus to get a captive audience every single day.

His “bliss” is not driving a bus, though that may be a source of enjoyment for some people. His bliss is singing. And the supervisors at the Chicago Transit Authority are perfectly happy about the whole arrangement. You see, people line up to ride his bus. They even let other buses pass by so they can ride with the “singing bus driver.” They love it!

Here is a man who believes he knows why he was put here on earth. For him, it is to make people happy. And the more he sings, the more people he makes happy! He has found a way to align his purpose in living with his occupation. By following his bliss, he is actually living the kind of life he believes he was meant to live.

Not everybody can identify a purpose in life. But when you do, and when you pursue it, you will be living the kind of life you feel you were meant to live. And what’s more, you will be happy.

Once a King called upon all of his wise men and asked them, Is there a mantra or suggestion which works in every situation, in every circumstances, in every place and in every time, in every joy, every sorrow, every defeat and every victory? One answer for all questions? Something which can help me, when none of you is available to advise me? Tell me is there any mantra?

All the wise men were puzzled by the Kings question. They thought and thought. After a lengthy discussion an old man suggested something which appealed to all of them. They went to the King and gave him something written on paper, with a condition that the King was not to see it out of curiosity. Only in extreme danger, when the King finds himself alone and there seems to be no way, only then he can see it. The King put the paper under his diamond ring.

Some time later, the neighbors attacked the Kingdom. The King and his army fought bravely but lost the battle. The King had to flee on his horse. The enemies were following him, getting closer and closer. Suddenly the King found himself standing at the end of the road – that road was not going anywhere. Underneath there was a rocky valley thousand feet deep. If he jumped in to it he would be finished and he could not return because it had enemy. The sound of enemy’s horses was approaching fast. The King became restless. There seemed to be no way.

Then suddenly he saw the diamond in his ring shining in the sun. He remembered the message hidden in the ring. He opened the paper and read the message. The message was – this too shall pass.

The King read it. Again read it. Suddenly something stick him – Yes! This too will pass. Only a few days ago, I was enjoying my kingdom. I was the mightiest of all the kings. Yet today, the kingdom and all its pleasure were gone. I am here trying to escape from enemies.

Like those days of luxuries have gone, this day of danger too will pass. A calm came on his face. He kept standing there. The place where he was standing was full of natural beauty. He had never known that such a beautiful place was also a part of his kingdom.

The revelation of the message had a great effect on him. He relaxed and forgot about those following him. After a few minutes he realized that the noise of the horses and the enemy coming was receding. They had moved in to some other part of the mountain and were not near him.

The King was very brave. He reorganized his army and fought again. He defeated the enemy and regained his empire. When he returned to his empire after victory, he was received with much fanfare. The whole capital was rejoicing in the victory. Every one was in festive mood. Flowers were being showered on the King from every house, from every corner. People were dancing and singing. For a moment, the King said to himself, I am one of the bravest and greatest kings. It is not easy to defeat me. With all the reception and celebration, he saw an ego emerging in him.

Suddenly the Diamond of his ring flashed in the sunlight and reminded him of the message. He opened it and read it again this too shall pass.

He became silent. His face went through a total change – from the egoist, he moved to a state of utter humbleness. If this too is going to pass, it is not yours. The defeat was not yours, the victory is not yours. You are just a watcher…. Everything passes by. We are witnesses of all this. We are the perceivers. Life comes and goes. Happiness comes and goes. Sorrow comes and goes.

One is just a witness of change. Experience it, understand it, and enjoy the present moment…..this too shall pass.

The question I have often been asked is “How do I stop my negative thoughts?”

The answer is unexpected - you cannot STOP negative thoughts; on the contrary, you will find that the more you try to STOP such thoughts, the appear with greater force.

The trick is to REPLACE negative thoughts with positive thoughts.

Try this simple exercise - can you think of a negative and a positive thought simultaneously?

You cannot - only one of them can exist at a time!

Thus, plant good and positive thoughts; when your mind is filled with them, negative thoughts cannot appear.

If one of them does appear, instantly REPLACE it with another positive thought. Do it everyday, all the time, consciously with complete awareness and you will find it becomes a habit. The barrage of negative thoughts start diminishing rapidly.

When you try to STOP negative thoughts, you are focusing on what you don’t want - negative thoughts - and you will attract an abundance of them. They can never disappear if you are focused on them. The STOP part becomes irrelevant - the negative thoughts are your focus.

It doesn’t matter if you are trying to stop negative thoughts or control them or push them away, the result is the same. Your focus is on negative thoughts, and by the law of attraction you are inviting more of them to you.

The truth is always simple and it is always easy. To stop negative thoughts, just plant good thoughts! Deliberately plant good thoughts! You plant good thoughts by making it a daily practice. Appreciate all the things in your day. Appreciate your health, your car, your home, your family, your job, your friends, your surroundings, your meals, your pets, and the magnificent beauty of the day.

Compliment, praise, and give thanks to all things. Every time you say “Thank you” it is a good thought! As you plant more and more good thoughts, the negative thoughts will gradually be wiped out.

Why? Because your focus is on good thoughts, and what you focus on you attract. So don’t give any attention to negative thoughts.

Don’t worry about them. If any come, make light of them, shrug them off, and let them be your reminder to deliberately think more good thoughts now.

The more good thoughts you can plant in a day, the faster your life will be transformed.

Tea is not only a beverage but has some healthy solutions to common problems as well, read this article for more information.

Tea happens to be an indulgence of mine. I start each morning with a cup of orange pekoe tea, sweetened with just a bit of sugar and a splash of cream. Each evening as I sit down in front of my computer to while away some time, I enjoy another identical cup. Most days will also find me indulging in several more cups of my favorite brew throughout the day. However, drinking tea is not this beverages only purpose. While tea as a drink has been around for thousands of years, it has been used for hundreds of other purposes also. Some of these uses, and some for tea in its modern form as a teabag, follow:

Muslin fabric can be tea stained to appear aged. Brew tea same as you would to drink, minus cream or sugar, soak fabric in liquid until it appears a bit darker than you would like the fabric to be. Keep in mind that it will lighten as it dries. Finished items can also be ‘tea stained’ in the same manner. An old blouse, or a piece of embroidery, or just about anything you can think of, can be ‘aged’ in this way. An avid bead worker, I occasionally work with porcupine quills, and have even dyed the quills using tea.

A tea bag works well as a compress on swollen, puffy eyes, just make sure that they have cooled sufficiently so as not to burn. A newly blackened eye can also benefit from a tea bag compress. It will help draw the bruise out so that it heals at a much faster rate than normal. The tannic acid that occurs naturally in black tea is also said to help eradicate warts. Place a warmed, wet tea bag directly onto a wart for ten to fifteen minutes. Repeat two or three times each day and you will notice the wart shrink in size after just a few days of this treatment.

If making glycerin melt and pour soap, add tea in nearly any form to a mold of soap before it cools. The tea will settle in the bottom of the mold, (top of the bar of soap) and makes an excellent cleansing soap. For an average hand size bar of soap, add between ½ to a whole tea bag. Mint tea will also make a nicely scented bar of soap. Soap, with tea added, makes a perfect bar of soap for the kitchen, and is one of the best odor removers I have ever used.

Chamomile tea is a natural sleep aid. Chamomile tea can also be brewed and allowed to cool to be used as a rinse for darker colored hair. It is said to leave hair with a very shiny, clean appearance. If used on lighter colored hair, it will work as a natural dye. Depending on the lightness of hair and the strength and color of the brewed tea, this can be an inexpensive way to darken your hair.

Tea bags that have cooled can be applied to sunburned areas of skin. They will help ease the pain and inflammation associated with sunburn. Mosquito bites can also be soothed in this manner.

In search of help for a few of my ailing houseplants, an elderly woman I know told me to ‘water’ my them with cooled tea every other day. With in a very short time my plants were well on their way to recovery. I now save any tea I do not drink from the drain, and share it with my plants. Leftover tea bags can be recycled into the garden, giving a lift to your outdoor plants as well.

With so many heavenly scented types of tea on the market today, it seems such a waste to only enjoy the deliciousness through drinking the tea. Tea bags, or loose tea in a small muslin bag, will make a perfect addition to your clothes drawers. These tea ’sachets’ can also be tucked under a vehicle seat, in your closet, in a bowl on the bathroom or kitchen counter, or just about anywhere you would like to add a small touch of scent.

Tea ’sachets’ made with plain old black tea make a perfect addition to your refrigerator. They will help keep food odors in control.

Chamomile or peppermint tea makes a very soothing footbath. They are both natural rejuvenators and will leave your feet both odor-free and softer at the same time. A cotton cloth soaked in chamomile or peppermint tea and then applied to other dry areas, such as elbows, or even the dry, cracked nipples of a nursing mother, will also be e benefit. Do check with your doctor first if nursing, as a physician should OK anything out of the normal routine of a nursing mother.

When I was very little, I can remember having a terrible toothache. My mother brewed a pot of tea, took the loose leaves, rolled them in a scrap of fabric, and had me hold this directly on the ache. Through the years, we children were given this treatment for nearly any mouth concern we had, be it a toothache, a canker sore, or a fat lip that my one brother gave my other brother. All of these were treated with a warm compress of tealeaves.

With all the different carpet fresheners on the market, you might be surprised that loose tea can work the same freshening magic. Sprinkle dry tea directly onto carpeting, and allow to settle in for about ten to fifteen minutes. Teas such as cinnamon or a vanilla spice work well, giving your room a nice scent and when vacuumed up, will deodorize the vacuum cleaner bag at the same time. This can also be done to pets bedding area, totally eradicating the pets’ odor. Spread dry tea on pet’s bedding, allow to ‘work’ and then either vacuum up or shake out the loose tea. I have even been told that tea is a natural inhibitor for fleas!

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own commonsense.

—Buddha (563BC-483BC)

Characteristics of Memory

1. Sensory - we remember things that involve our five senses. So, the more senses that get activate, the easier it will be to recall.
2. Intensity - when something is more intensely funny, sexual, absurd, etc. it tends to stand out in our memories.
3. Outstanding - things that are dull and unoriginal are more difficult to remember because there is nothing to distinguish them from all the other memories.
4. Emotional - the amygdala - a round, pea-sized part in the middle of the brain - acts as a gate keeper, so when something happens that has high emotional content - positive or negative - the amygdale says, “This is important!” and we tend to remember it more easily.
5. Survival - the brain is wired for survival. This means that anything we perceive as important to survival we will remember more easily. It’s not just physical survival. Survival can include, emotional survival, psychological survival and financial survival.
6. Personal importance - we naturally remember things that interest us and that have some personal importance.
7. Repetition - the more often we recall information, the better we get at recalling on demand.
8. First and last - the brain most easily recalls things from the beginning and the ending of any session or lecture.

Keys to Memory

1. Pay attention - often times the biggest problem is that people’s minds are not focused in the moment. Instead, they are thinking about something in the past of future.
2. Visualization - create a visual in your mind because the brain thinks in pictures and concepts, not paragraphs.
3. Association - find something to connect the information to…similar to word association. Ask, “What does this remind me of?”
4. Imagination - get creative when visualizing or making associations.

If you don’t keep your mind active, studies show that your brain loses some of its functionality as you age, which causes memory loss, brain fog, and even Alzheimer’s.

A well-stimulated brain also elevates your mood, which helps you feel better on the inside.

Here are 15 brain boosting activities:

1. Play games that challenge and stimulate your mind. These include:

* Picture Puzzles

* Strategy Games

* Crossword Puzzles

* Card Games

* Deduction Games (such as Clue)

* Visualization Puzzles

* Optical Illusions

2. Reading stimulates the brain as it activates your imagination. Reading also helps with memory retention and problem solving, especially if you’re reading a mystery. Also, self-help books stimulate your brain by helping you to think for yourself, as well as find solutions in your mind..

3. Exercising helps circulate blood that carries oxygen to your brain. Over the long-term, exercise is proven to increase brainpower and even create new neurons.

4. Stimulate your brain with meditation. Meditation has been shown to increase your IQ, relieve stress, and promote a higher level of brain functioning. Meditation also stimulates the prefrontal cortex of the brain, the area of the brain responsible for advanced thinking, ability and performance.

5. Deep breathing helps deliver oxygen to your brain. Oxygen helps you be more alert and awake. As little as 10 to 15 minutes of deep breathing daily can increase brain functionality.

6. Taking fish oil supplements is literally like membrane material for the brain.. The two primary components in fish oil, DHA and EPA, strengthen the emotional center of the brain and boost focus.

7. Studies have proven that listening to music strengthens the right hemisphere of the brain and actually changes the structure of it. Also, people who listen to music are shown to be more emotionally intelligent than those who don’t.

8. Writing improves memory and thought ex-pression. Writing articles, blogs, or journal entries stimulates thought processes, which also enhances brain function.

9. Sleep clears out brain clutter and reduces brain fog. When you don’t get enough sleep at night, your memory and normal brain function suffers.

10. Painting is shown to be an effective brain booster in that it sparks the creativity within you. Even if you’ve never tried painting before, give it a shot. You’ll find that you feel more creative and may actually enjoy it.

11. Starting the day out with a good breakfast has been proven to supply energy to the brain and body for the whole day. When you skip breakfast, you’re missing out on a powerful edge, both physically and mentally.

12. Walking allows you to clear your mind and thoughts. Not only is it good exercise for your body, walking gives your brain a chance to wander freely, clearing it of any troublesome thoughts.

13. Drink a serving of pure fruit juice. Fruit juice contains nutrients that revitalize and refresh the brain. Juices to drink are pomegranate, blueberry, and cranberry as they deliver more focus and energy.

14. Students who drink some caffeine before an exam typically have higher scores than those who don’t. This is because caffeine stimulates activity in the brain, which produces better focus and thinking ability. Don’t overdo it though!

15. Draw a picture. Like painting, drawing stimulates the creative side of your brain. So get out some colored pencils and start boosting your brainpower.

To get the most out of these brain boosting activities, mix them up and do a variety of them at different times. Just choosing one won’t boost your brainpower, however, combining and alternating them will give your brain the added boost you need now and in the long run.

Scientists have solved the mystery of why
migraine sufferers shun the light.

Light intensifies migraine headaches because of a particular
group of retina cells at the back of the eye, research has shown.
The photoreceptors send signals to the brain via the optic nerve
which stimulate migraine pain neurons.

Even small amounts of light are enough to affect the
nerve pathway, sending victims running for the shadows.
People who are totally blind due to eye diseases such as
retinal cancer and glaucoma are not affected by light
during migraine attacks, the study found.

But this was not true of “legally blind” individuals
with severely impaired eyesight, who cannot make out
images but detect the presence of light.
Migraine is a one-sided, throbbing headache associated with
symptoms that can include nausea, vomiting and fatigue.

The pain is believed to develop when the meninges -
the system of membranes that surround the brain -
becomes irritated.
Nearly 85% of migraine sufferers are highly sensitive to light,
a condition known as photophobia, but until now no-one understood why.

Professor Rami Burstein, from the Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Centre
in Boston,US, who conducted tests on totally and “legally” blind migraine
sufferers, said: “While the patients in the first group did not experience
any worsening of their headaches from light exposure,
the patients in the second group clearly described intensified pain when
they were exposed to light, in particular blue or grey wavelengths. “

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper.

His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper,

He must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger,

The number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence.

The fence will never be the same.

When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out.

It won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there.”

A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. Friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share words of praise and they always want to open their hearts to us.”

As I was passing the elephants, I suddenly stopped, confused by the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a small rope tied to their front leg. No chains, no cages. It was obvious that the elephants could, at anytime, break away from their bonds but for some reason, they did not.

I saw a trainer near by and asked why these beautiful, magnificent animals just stood there and made no attempt to get away. “Well,” he said, “when they are very young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them and, at that age, it’s enough to hold them. As they grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away.

They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free.” I was amazed. These animals could at any time break free from their bonds but because they believed they couldn’t, they were stuck right where they were.

Like the elephants, how many of us go through life hanging onto a belief that we cannot do something, simply because we failed at it once before?????